March 12, 2013

FFW 365 DAY CHALLENGE #71


4 comments:

  1. Dead Man Walking

    “Come on, come on, we’ll catch you, you animal. How’s he? Alive or dead?”

    And he hid in the corner, afraid of the men knocking his door down.

    He didn’t do anything wrong, he thought. He just didn’t want to be alone anymore.

    The man fought him; he didn’t want to be with him, so he grabbed him by force, just like when he was a kid and his father hit him and grabbed him by the arm, dragging him inside the house like a ragdoll, helpless, and locking him in the dark pantry.

    He was nice. He allowed the man to sit in the living-room with him. He fed him, he gave him water. The man tried to escape, so he had to chain him to the sofa. And the wheel of time turned slowly.

    The man wouldn’t shut up, like his father cussing him all the way from the front yard for hours and hours, and endless hours of darkness. So, he hit the man to silence him, at least for a few minutes, just a few minutes of quietness, just a little bit of peace.

    “Come on. Open the door.”

    But they never gave him any peace. They kept hitting the door, slamming away a storm in his head.

    When the door finally opened, all had died inside. Some had died a bit with the horror of what they saw. Others died for good, like him, a dead man walking from the time when he was still a child and his mother slammed the door and walked away, leaving him behind, alone and helpless.

    For him, the door had finally closed. It was the end.
    ©2013 Lizzie Gudkov

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    Replies
    1. Very powerful, Lizzie! Thank you for sharing your story! :)

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    2. You're welcome, Camie! The prompt was so powerful that the story was written very quickly. Then it was a matter of editing a bit and... intentionally repeating some verbs/situations to stress the main character's feelings. I never get tired of saying this, great visual prompts you have been posting! Thank you. :)

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